I am so screwed.

At least that’s what people think. Which is okay with me. I know, dangerous game I’m playing and all, but I think I could get used to this. Soon I’ll have Storm wrapped around my little finger. I’ve realized that all I had to do was give him a small sample of what he wants and suddenly the tables are turned! But I rather like people thinking he’s got the upper hand now. It makes them think that I’m always just on the verge of losing everything and now that I think about it, that’s just how I like it. Since I’d really rather not the Summer Court know that I know exactly what Storm desires and can do whatever I want with it, I’ll just let them think that Storm is the one manipulating me.

Turns out that my own court isn’t quite as solidly behind me as I’d like, though. Luckily, I have a plan for that, too! What I’ve learned is that a girl’s got to draw out her enemies. Pretend you’re like a maimed fox, limping along and nearly overwhelmed. It will draw out my enemies. And then I will pounce!

Though I’m not sure my thorns are terribly sharp yet. I’m working on that though.

It’s a delicate game. If I mess up or wait too long, then I’m the one who gets pounced. Although that’s fun, too, sometimes…

…

Where was I? Oh right! It goes without saying that I’m not the only one trying to manipulate things into a shape I can manage. Someone else appears to be trying to manipulate public views about me, too. Well, that’s okay. I do what I have to after all. I’ll take whatever they dish out and I’ll turn it into my own advantage! I’m the Queen of Sin and I’ll do whatever I have to to protect myself and those I care about.

Whatever it takes.

Next up; how to deal with what the Ashen Throne desires most. This could get ugly.

Okay, now I’m scared for Qing. I got some information and it’s not good. Okay, it’s also not 100% accurate either, or at least I don’t feel anything like positive it could be true. But if it is, and if we become targets, then Qing is the one vulnerable. I can protect the rest.

I need to convince her somehow that she needs to let me do this for her. But how? Every way I can think of makes it sound like I’m trying to manipulate her. I try to listen to the words I would use as if I were her and it sounds… it sounds like I’m just as bad as they are. Manipulating, selfish, cruel.

The thing is, it might be totally unnecessary. And if it is, then I will have drawn her further into something she doesn’t want. But if I don’t, she’s a threat to us all. A terrible danger! One so bad that if I told Brigid or Diesel, they might do something about it. So I can’t tell them, because I might be wrong. Well, I’m probably wrong.
Continue reading Cassandra’s Audio Journal Entry 3 →

It’s been two months since my last entry. laughter I feel like I’m giving confession. Forgive me diary for I have sinned!

Actually, I’ve been really busy over the past two months. I’ve been spending a lot of time at court and in the Hedge, some time with Jasmin, and the rest of my time has been split between dancing at Starr’s in the evening and photo shoots. Sometimes I feel like I’m running myself ragged. Less than more months of this and I’ll be able to turn things over to Summer, which will frankly be a relief.

I’m making a lot of money lately, with all this work. But running the Duchy is expensive! I’ve set up this charitable fund thing which helps out less fortunate changelings, especially when they first make it home from the Hedge. The idea is that members of the Duchy will all chip in what they can to help everyone else out. Unfortunately, there aren’t very many changelings with a lot of disposable wealth, and the ones willing to part with that wealth are even fewer. So I’ve pretty much been giving everything I’ve got to this thing. I need to show that I believe in this and that if others believe in it too and contribute, I can make good things happen for them. Nice idea. In practice, I’m not sure it’s working out. Continue reading Cassandra’s Audio Journal Entry 2 →